I'm never really good in expressing my feelings. Even when it comes to writing it down. I don't have anyone to turn to when i'm feeling depressed or facing problems. My house is filled with busy people and they don't exactly give a damn with the others. I'm the type of girl that never really fits in in a crowd. Sometimes in school i feel quite alone sometimes, maybe during recess I would just sit there aimlessly knowing what's going on. I'm very very very bad in starting conversation and sometimes would rely on the other to start talking to me. I may have a very weird attitude and I might talk a little bit differently cause I'm not used to the speaking very good/normal chinese when i grew up. Sometimes I do realize people may talk behind my back or maybe build a barrier between me and them. Sometimes I do feel happy with some people who doesn't care how weird I am and it's very easy talking to them ,sometimes laughing. One conversation with a person already puts a huge smile on my face.
I come home every single day most of the time feeling so alone and sometimes Sometimes, I do feel like i wanna cry. I have a sister who comes home during evenings and a mother is always stuck in cyberworld.
Things may not go right for me. I don't know which path I should take. Feeling lost and lonely sometimes makes me wanna give up on living.
I know I'm very very emotional right now but i've felt this way for a long time now. and i honestly don't know what to do. maybe it's fate, i'm meant be like this the whole time.
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